Sunday 16 January 2011

The Mason's Arms, Maddox Street, Mayfair

Until 1686 the May Fair was held around the street now known as the Haymarket. Recently my valet pointed out that the fair had been moved to Bow following complaints from local residents. He further expounded that a number of amusing public houses had been built in that area now.

We strolled along there one Saturday evening with a number of jovial chums in search of the requisite bread/cheese/pickle combo. We were alarmed that the first two establishments that are feet took us to closed their doors at six of the clock. Cursing ourselves for not having taken the simple expedient of looking for a ploughman's lunch at lunchtime we eventually came upon The Masons' Arms.

There were a surprising number of mechanicals in the establishment but it was not possible to unequivocally determine that they worked with stone. Nonetheless, an appropriate handshake and a brown Bank of England voucher procued the above Ploughman's Platter and the corresponding tankard of foaming ale. Bread-to-butter was high but within tolerance. Foliage surprisingly dense for a mechanical audience; cheese selection limited. What most struck us though was the luminosity of the mustard. Having donned approriate protective clothing we took the relevant readings but determined that we had received no more radiation than one would have done on a business class flight to New York.

Mood: luminous mustard yellow
Experience: Masonic

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